Austin 3:15: Texans broke rookie contracts; Judge fastest to 350; Angels botch MLB Draft

15 WEEKEND HEADLINES. 15 BOTTOM LINE THOUGHTS. 15 WORDS OR LESS.

Top Story

The Houston Texans broke rookie contracts

1) Texans gave Jayden Higgins the first fully guaranteed 2nd round contract and now nobody’s signing.

NFL

Cleveland Browns + Ohio State players + Round 2 = PR Nightmare

2) Quinshon Judkins goes back-to-back with Mike Hall as 2nd rounders arrested before camp.

Ndamukong Suh retires; player safety immediately improves

3) Five All-Pros and a few players stepped on later, Suh hangs up disruptive, scumbagish career.

MLB

Newsflash: Aaron Judge hits home runs. 350 to be exact

4) Judge becomes the quickest to ever reach 350 home runs. Decent hitter of baseballs.

Bring star power back to the Home Run Derby

5) McGwire, Sosa, Bonds, etc. Fans are tired of saying “who?” around the formerly star-studded event.

Steal of the MLB draft at *checks notes* pick 3

6) LSU’s Kade Anderson, widely considered the top overall prospect, “falls” to Mariners at pick three.

Meanwhile.. Angels fans are PISSED

7) The Angels, at pick two, passed on two consensus top three picks (Anderson and Ethan Holliday). Launch the investigations.

Family legacy renews in Colorado (thanks to the Angels)

8) Holliday drafted fourth to the Rockies, where it all started for his dad (Matt). Romantic sport.

“Big Dumper” almost ties Bonds’ record

9) Cal Raleigh launched a granny for #38, just missing Bonds’ pre-All Star break homer record (39).

The White Sox remain cursed and an elite type of suck

10) Andrew Vaughn went from lifeless to immediately dominant after trade to Milwaukee. Fire everyone.

NBA

NBA storylines die and naturally a LeBron rumor rises. Funny the timing…

11) Heard this before? LeBron’s team facilitates trade rumor… LeBron stays quiet… National media freakout ensues.

New Bucks center Myles Turner throws shade at the Pacers

12) Many didn’t want to pay him, now he’s gone, and there’s clearly no love lost.

Have a day Kobe Bufkin

13) Hawks’ rook drops 29; goes a perfect 15-15 at the stripe. That’ll get ya paid.

NCAA

College football kicks into gear with a disorderly conduct charge

14) Texas A&M’s Le’Veon Moss finds trouble after making repeated threats. Hot start for CFB!

WNBA

Both teams rack up 20 points over the average score in wild WNBA game

15) All-Star A’ja Wilson’s 34 and 16 leads the Aces in wild 104-102 win.